Kipling saw through this: so it comes that Man, the coward, when he gathers to confer With his fellow-braves in council, dare not leave a place for her. In other words, for women the question of funniness is essentially a secondary one. They are innately aware of a higher calling that is no laughing matter. Whereas with a man you may freely say of him that he is lousy in the sack, or a bad driver, or an inefficient worker, and still wound him less deeply than you would if you accused him of being deficient in the humor department. If i am correct about this, which i am, then the explanation for the superior funniness of men is much the same as for the inferior funniness of women. Men have to pretend, to themselves as well as to women, that they are not the servants and supplicants. Women, cunning minxes that they are, have to affect not to be the potentates.
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After cleverly noticing that with the male mirth obscene diverts his anger—which is true of most work on that great write masculine equivalent to childbirth, which is warfare—kipling insists: But the woman that God gave him, every fibre of her frame, proves her launched for one. The word issue there, which we so pathetically misuse, is restored to its proper meaning of childbirth. As Kipling continues: She who faces death by torture for each life beneath her breast may not deal in doubt or pity—must not swerve for fact or jest. Men are overawed, not to say terrified, by the ability of women to produce babies. (Asked by a lady intellectual to summarize the differences between the sexes, another bishop responded, madam, i cannot conceive.) It gives women an unchallengeable authority. And one of the earliest origins of humor that we know about is its role in the mockery of authority. Irony itself has been called the glory of slaves. So you could argue that when men get together to be funny and do not expect women to be there, or in on the joke, they are really playing truant and implicitly conceding who is really the boss. The ancient annual festivities of Saturnalia, where the slaves would play master, were a temporary running release from bossdom. A whole tranche of subversive male humor likewise depends on the notion that women are not really the boss, but are mere objects and victims.
Keep your eye on that last word. Womens appetite for talk about that fine product known as Depend is limited. So is their relish for gags about premature slip ejaculation. As a friend of mine indignantly demands to know.) But child is the key word. For women, reproduction is, if not the only thing, certainly the main thing. Apart from giving them a very different attitude to filth and embarrassment, it also imbues them with the kind of seriousness and solemnity at which men can only goggle. This womanly seriousness was well caught by rudyard Kipling in his poem The female of the Species.
The reproductive and eliminating functions (the closeness of which line is the origin of all obscenity) were obviously blume wired together in hell by some subcommittee that was giggling cruelly as it went about its work. (Think theyd wear this? Well, theyre gonna have.) The resulting confusion is the source of perhaps 50 percent of all humor. Thats what the customers want, as we occasional stand-up performers all know. Filth, and plenty. Filth in lavish, heaping quantities. And theres another principle that helps exclude the fair sex. Men obviously like gross stuff, says Fran Lebowitz.
They want them as an audience, not as rivals. And there is a huge, brimming reservoir of male unease, which it would be too easy for women to exploit. (Men can tell jokes about what happened to john wayne bobbitt, but they dont want women doing.) Men have prostate glands, hysterically enough, and these have a tendency to give out, along with their hearts and, it has to be said, their dicks. This is funny only in male company. For some reason, women do not find their own physical decay and absurdity to be so riotously amusing, which is why we admire lucille ball and Helen fielding, who do see the funny side. But this is so rare as to be like. Johnsons comparison of a woman preaching to a dog walking on its hind legs: the surprise is that it is done at all. The plain fact is that the physical structure of the human being is a joke in itself: a flat, crude, unanswerable disproof of any nonsense about intelligent design.
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And the sapphic faction may have its own reasons for wanting what I want—the sweet surrender of female laughter. While jewish humor, boiling as it is with angst and self-deprecation, is almost masculine by definition. Substitute the term self-defecation (which i actually heard being used inadvertently once) and almost all men will laugh right away, if only to pass the time. Probe a little deeper, though, and you aking will see what nietzsche meant when he described a witticism as an epitaph on the death of a feeling. Male humor prefers the laugh to be at someones expense, and understands that life is quite possibly a joke to begin with—and often a joke in extremely poor taste. Humor is part of the armor-plate with which to resist what is already farcical enough.
(Perhaps not by coincidence, battered as they are by motherfucking nature, men tend to refer to life itself as a bitch.) Whereas women, bless their tender hearts, would prefer that life be fair, and even sweet, rather than the sordid mess it actually. Jokes about calamitous visits to the doctor or the shrink or the bathroom, or the venting of sexual frustration on furry domestic animals, are a male province. It must have been a man who originated the phrase funny like a heart attack. In all the millions of cartoons that feature a patient listening glum-faced to a physician (Theres no cure. There isnt even a race for a cure do you remember even one where the patient is a woman? I thought as much. Precisely because humor is a sign of intelligence (and many women believe, or were taught by their mothers, that they become threatening to men if they appear too bright it could be that in some way men do not want women to be funny.
Women arent like that. And the wits and comics among them are formidable beyond compare: Dorothy parker, nora Ephron, Fran Lebowitz, ellen degeneres. (Though ask yourself, was Dorothy parker ever really funny?) Greatly daring—or so i thought—I resolved to call. Ephron to try out my theories. Fran responded: The cultural values are male; for a woman to say a man is funny is the equivalent of a man saying that a woman is pretty. Also, humor is largely aggressive and pre-emptive, and whats more male than that?
Ephron did not disagree. She did, however, in what I thought was a slightly feline way, accuse me of plagiarizing a rant by jerry lewis that said much the same thing. (I have only once seen Lewis in action,. The king of Comedy, where it was really sandra bernhard who was funny.). In any case, my argument doesnt say that there are no decent women comedians. There are more terrible female comedians than there are terrible male comedians, but there are some impressive ladies out there. Most of them, though, when you come to review the situation, are hefty or dykey or Jewish, or some combo of the three. When Roseanne stands up and tells biker jokes and invites people who dont dig her shtick to suck her dick—know what i am saying?
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Slower to get it, more pleased when they do, and swift to locate the unfunny—for this we need the Stanford University School of Medicine? And business remember, this is women when confronted with humor. Is it any wonder that they are backward in generating it? This is not to say that women are humorless, or cannot make great wits and comedians. And if they did not operate on the humor wavelength, there would be scant point in half killing oneself in the attempt to make them writhe and scream (uproariously). Wit, after all, is the unfailing symptom of intelligence. Men will laugh at almost anything, often precisely because it is—or they are—extremely stupid.
These included the left prefrontal cortex, suggesting monash a greater emphasis on language and executive processing in women, and the nucleus accumbens. Which is part of the mesolimbic reward center. This has all the charm and address of the learned Professor Scullys attempt to define a smile, as cited by richard Usborne in his treatise. Wodehouse: the drawing back and slight lifting of the corners of the mouth, which partially uncover the teeth; the curving of the naso-labial furrows. but have no fear—it gets worse: Women appeared to have less expectation of a reward, which in this case was the punch line of the cartoon, said the reports author,. So when they got to the jokes punch line, they were more pleased about. The report also found that women were quicker at identifying material they considered unfunny.
then, you have at least. I shall not elaborate further. Women have no corresponding need to appeal to men in this way. They already appeal to men, if you catch my drift. Indeed, we now have all the joy of a scientific study, which illuminates the difference. At the Stanford University School of Medicine (a place, as it happens, where i once underwent an absolutely hilarious procedure with a sigmoidoscope the grim-faced researchers showed 10 men and 10 women a sample of 70 black-and-white cartoons and got them to rate the gags. To annex for a moment the fall-about language of the report as it was summarized. Biotech week: The researchers found that men and women share much of the same humor-response system; both use to a similar degree the part of the brain responsible for semantic knowledge and juxtaposition and the part involved in language processing. But they also found that some brain regions were activated more in women.
Why are women, who have the whole male book world at their mercy, not funny? Please do not pretend not to know what i am talking about. All right—try it the other way (as the bishop said to the barmaid). Why are men, taken on average and as a whole, funnier than women? Well, for one thing, they had damn well better. The chief task in life that a man has to perform is that of impressing the opposite sex, and Mother Nature (as we laughingly call her) is not so kind to men. In fact, she equips many fellows with very little armament for the struggle. An average man has just one, outside chance: he had better be able to make the lady laugh. Making them laugh has been one of the crucial preoccupations of my life.
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Be your gender what it may, you will certainly have heard essay the following from a female friend who is enumerating the charms of a new (male) squeeze: Hes really quite cute, and hes kind to my friends, and he knows all kinds of stuff, and. (If you yourself are a guy, and you know the man in question, you will often have said to yourself, funny? He wouldnt know a joke if it came served on a bed of lettuce with sauce béarnaise. ) However, there is something that you absolutely never hear from a male friend who is hymning his latest (female) love interest: Shes a real honey, has a life of her own. Interlude for attributes that are none of your business. And, man, does she ever make em laugh. Now, why is this? Why is it the case?, i mean.